It’s a Toss Up

Jill's Journal: Living in such a small space feels a little bit like playing house. While it’s been fun and magical so far, it does remain to be determined which simple convenience I miss more…a dishwasher or a garbage disposal. Distance definitely makes the heart grow fonder. I never knew how much I loved them until they were gone. If you have them, spoil them, cherish them, and tell them every day how grateful you are for them!!

It Can Be Done!

Jill's Journal: This is what it looks like when a family is hyper-committed to downsize, purge, and consolidate: less than 40 square feet worth of “keepers,” all from a 1,500 square foot house, garage, attic, separate office with almost 1,000 square feet of additional storage space, plus a horse barn and varied farm equipment. It really can be done!

And truly, we kept more than we thought we would. I’ll bet we could go through it again and cut it down by half. But as we’re getting down to the wire, we’ve started having thoughts like this, “Well, I really like my wine glasses. We have the storage space; why not keep them instead of having to buy them again someday when we settle down?” So yes, we kept more than we intended. But most of the boxes are full of sentiment, like an antique mirror from Rob’s grandmother who died before he was born. Or framed family portraits. Or my wedding dress (which I considered parting with, but I have three daughters and what if it means something to one of them someday?).

Our storage unit is 10x10, the size of a small horse stall; Rob’s tools and the girls’ bedroom furniture will take up the rest of the space. Life’s essentials will fit into the RV; everything else is gone or going!

It has been wonderful to go through every item in our possession. A true journey. We learned there’s so much we don’t need and/or that wasn’t worth keeping if it had been in a box for the last 10 years. How many people never go through all their belongings in their lifetime and it’s left for their children to do after they’re gone? Hopefully I'll still be on this earth for a long time to come, but I don’t want to do that to my kids. Rob and I have commented to each other so many times that everyone should downsize like this in mid-life; it’s been a bit of a roller coaster ride (lots of highs and lows) sorting through every single piece of paper, memento, item of clothing, etc. But like any great roller coaster, it has left us flushed with excitement and accomplishment at tackling it (and surviving to tell the tale)!

Spice Solution

Jill's Journal: We’re obviously tight on space in the fifth wheel and I’ve been searching for a solution for the everyday spices used in cooking. I’ve had visions of 30-40 little spice bottles floating around in a cupboard and falling out every time I opened it. Imagine my excitement when I found this! It’s called a tubular spice rack and fits 40 spices, all contained in less than one square foot of space. The test tubes are supposedly big enough to each hold more than one standard bottle of spices. UPS will deliver mine any day now. I can’t wait to try it out!

“Live the Life You’ve Imagined”

Jill's Journal: I came across the perfect quote (for us at this moment in our lives) by Henry David Thoreau, who is of course the master of perfect quotations.

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.”

Live the life you’ve imagined. I love that. We’ve been striving so hard to get there and we’re so close we can taste it. Six weeks to launch.

A recent, wonderful post on Unclutterer.com said essentially the same thing: Is the Life You’re Pursuing the Life You Want?

I can honestly say yes! And it’s not a foreign concept to me or to us. We’ve made drastic changes before to follow our dreams. We’re not afraid to jump. Yet, reading posts like this makes me think a lot of people are afraid to step outside of their known comfort zones. I don’t understand that. If you are unhappy with something, change it. Or change your attitude about it. We only live once. Make the most of it. Make it a beautiful life. Live the life you’ve imagined.

“Adventuring With Children”

Jill's Journal: I skimmed another book with our journey in mind. Nan Jeffrey’s “Adventuring With Children: An Inspirational Guide to World Travel & the Outdoors” is a little outdated and not necessarily suited to the RV traveler, but there were some great tidbits nonetheless. Mostly it provided plenty of fodder for our belief that what we’re planning isn’t crazy and will enrich our children’s lives.

Some of my favorite passages include:

(Regarding meeting other adventuring families)
“…We spoke a common language—that of homeschooling and one-burner meals, of family cohesion and a sense of achievement, of sleeping in strange places and absorbing alien cultures, of raising our children in a neighborhood that encompassed the world. It was the language of an adventuring family.”

(Regarding the joy of traveling as a family unit)
“…It doesn’t take long to grasp that family adventuring is much more than taking a highly stimulating trip. It’s time apart, a chance to discover and reflect, to explore and grow…Regardless of destination or mode of travel, the benefits of this temporary lifestyle are many: living simply, becoming self-sufficient, experiencing new cultures and ideas, challenging your mind and body, being in harmony with the natural world, learning to have patience and tolerance and be content, and developing an unassailable joie de vivre. Best of all it fosters an interdependence within the family, one that encompasses all ages as you work toward a common goal.”

(And finally, encouragement to travel the world, not just the country)
“The presence of children will do much toward bridging the cultural gap, for children represent the ultimate peace offering the world over. Most of the world dotes on their young and will welcome yours with open arms. Your children will elicit a hospitality and generate a warmth denied most tourists, resulting in a more meaningful, enjoyable experience.”

And the Purging Marches On

Jill's Journal: It seems not too many days go by without me purging items, whether that means selling, donating, or destroying them. Last week I sold a saddle to a lady in Tennessee and donated a mountain of old tack to Central Kentucky Riding for the Handicapped. And a few days ago, Adam and Kristi had a massive burn pile and I burned 11 – yes, 11! – file boxes of old papers. Electric bills from 15 years ago, performance reviews from old jobs, etc. just don’t seem so important to keep! Seeing all that paper – records of life’s details – go up in flames was remarkably freeing.

We actually had a pretty uncluttered and tidy life compared to the average American family before this whole process started, but it’s amazing how much stuff one really doesn’t need.

Occasionally I glance at a site called unclutterer.com and a recent post struck close to home. In brief:

“Even if you live to be 100, life is short… There are only 24 hours in a day, and I want to spend those hours focused on what is important to me… Uncluttering is about clearing the distractions that get in the way of your remarkable life. Once the distractions are gone, you can pursue your priorities and make the most of your life. My life’s motto is to Carpe Vitam — Seize Life.”

It sort of sums up why we’re seeking this adventure. We want to focus on what matters most to us – our little family – and the fabulous purging we’re doing now will help remove all the distractions. Bring it on!

Epiphany City…or Maybe Just a Bitch Fest

Jill's Journal: We’re going on day #11 now since Rob left to pick up the fifth wheel. Even though I’m not the one on the road with the hours of silence and nothing to do but think, I’ve still had a few minor epiphanies (or maybe complaints?!) here.

*I love being a parent, but doing it all alone day in and day out is not the easiest thing in the world. Worse still is that Rob was gone in Vegas for a week of poker in July and will leave again in early September for another eight or nine consecutive days. That makes more than a month of “gone time” in a span of 2 1/2 months. It’s going to wear on me at some point. The very fact that I’m writing this down may prove it already is! I’m so looking forward to our family being on the road together.

*Here’s a very personal one: A year ago, I was at a wonderful weight. Thin and feeling fabulous about my body. But I’ve gained close to 20 pounds since then and no matter how hard I’ve tried, it doesn’t want to come off. Some major things have happened during that time – I stopped breastfeeding, I went on birth control for the first time in several years, and yes, I’m getting older. All that combined means inevitable weight gain. I’ve clearly known this for a while, but this week brought a realization as I’ve felt some serious sadness about an old family friend who had part of a lung removed in a second fight with cancer. I realized after she is gone, no one is going to remember that she was always a little plump. People will remember her warm, welcoming spirit instead. So here’s my epiphany: I can continue to fight my weight and be miserable or I can embrace myself the way I am and be happy. I choose happiness. I don’t have the time right now to battle weight. And, I want to be the kind of Mom who bakes cookies with her kids and enjoys the moment; not the kind who eats like a bird and makes her children weight-conscious at way too young of an age. We eat healthy and should enjoy some of the good stuff too. So, a couple of days ago, I finally bit the bullet and purchased some new clothes that actually fit. Yes, they’re two sizes bigger than my fabulous post-baby body. But this body of mine has given birth to three amazing children and I’m grateful for it. This is me. Today I will be purging my skinny clothes. Seeing them in my closet just makes me sad, so there’s no point in keeping them. I’m closer in size to where I was before children and that’s okay. I embrace me! This positive attitude is right in line with what we hope to teach our girls through the grand RV adventure.

*And the final epiphany of the week: I cannot wait to homeschool. Driving 4 1/2 miles one way through heavy traffic twice a day (and past nine other schools until we get to the one we were assigned) is killing me! I know people do it every day and I used to too; in fact, I used to commute 90 minutes each way in the brutal Southern California traffic daily. However, I long for the simple things these days. Having to get three kids out the door at the crack of daylight and fight traffic under a time clock (since three tardies in a school year is considered truancy) in order to get one child to kindergarten causes me great stress! We’re only two weeks in and I’m miserable. I thrive on routine and schedule, but this is not the good kind! Thank heaven Erika is loving kindergarten. That makes it all worth it, but I still cannot wait to homeschool!

Ditch the Stuff; Focus on Family

Jill's Journal: I’ll admit it: I love reading blogs. And today I found something so profound on Simple Mom. It fit our trip and our philospophy so beautifully that I had to share it. It’s a guest post from Nicole at Burning Bridges and this is the part that I simply had to include:

"Be Rich in FREEDOM.
"When I loosen my grip on money and things in order to give to others, my things and my money loosen their grip on me. Letting go of something I think I need reveals that my need is not as deep as I thought. Letting go of some portion of my money or some thing I’m keeping as a safety net or luxury — if I can finally let it go — helps me redefine my needs. Am I dead? Am I freezing? Am I hungry? Am I bleeding? Most probably not. When we hold tightly to things, we start to fear the day of their release. And yet, ironically, it’s often our holding them so tightly that binds us up with fear in the first place.

"Be Rich in RELATIONSHIPS.
"If you’re like me, then the more stuff you have, the more you’re consumed with managing it all. Cleaning, sorting, organizing, and analyzing. Things have mass and the more mass we own, the more we are weighed down with it all. When we use our things and our assets to bless others, we remind ourselves that people are of primary importance and that relationships will outlast everything else."

Isn’t that profound? That’s what is at the heart of our trip: the simplifying of our lives to focus on our family. Because in the end, that’s what matters the most.

Craig’s List, eBay, and Purging…Oh My

Jill's Journal: No one can say I’m not taking downsizing seriously. A little more than two months ago, I started cutting down on stuff. Probably 99.9% of people in this country have more things than they could ever need and we’re no exception. I’ve always hated clutter and always liked living minimalistically, but that doesn’t mean we’re down to the bare bones, by any means. Not yet, anyway.

My first big foray into cleansing the “stuff” palate was finding new homes for all my horse racing videos. We’re talking videotapes of every Breeders’ Cup race since its inception (1984), all Triple Crown races from the last 20 years, and literally thousands of other races and racing industry events.

This was a big step. This collection of videos held a very special place in my heart. For Pete’s sake, we moved to Kentucky for horse racing and this wonderful game puts food on our table and is our sole source of income. To say we’d be lost without racing is an understatement. It’s more than a passion…it’s a way of life and a major love.

I knew after saying goodbye to these videos that everything else would be relatively easy, so that’s why I started with them. I’m pleased to say I found good racing homes for all of them and they promise to be loved and cherished. :-) It was bittersweet to part with them, but I did it.

And then I delved into Craig’s List. It’s not my favorite thing, as I hate having to meet people to exchange an item for money, but it’s working out well. I’ve already sold several larger items – mostly baby stuff – and gotten cold, hard cash in exchange for them. It feels good!

And now tonight, I just closed on my first eBay sale – it was just a few dollars for some scrapbooking scissors, but it was a start. I had dabbled in eBay 10 years ago and I certainly had to jump through a few hoops to reactive my seller’s account, but I couldn’t be more excited. It’s such a thrill to start parting with things and get some money for them! Every item sold represents another step closer to our adventure of a lifetime.

"Living Aboard Your RV"

Jill's Journal: As much as I love to read, actually enjoying a book rarely happens with little ones about. But this time I was persistent, which meant sometimes half a page every three days and sometimes 20 pages in one day. The end result was reading from start to finish “Living Aboard Your RV” by Janet and Gordon Groene.

It’s touted as “The Complete Guide to a Life on Wheels.” At times it was overly simplistic, but they tried to cover everything, which I do appreciate. It was a wonderful surprise to realize we had actually already thought of just about everything they brought up – everything from dental care on the road to mail forwarding to generators. And that in itself was very rewarding – just knowing that we’re going about this the right way, with our eyes open and our bases covered.

However, the best thing about the book was three realizations it gave me. First, it never occurred to me to sell most of our belongings. I just assumed we’d put everything in storage until we returned to a stationary home. But many things don’t weather storage well and why pay storage fees for stuff we barely use now or for furniture that may not fit into a future home anyway? The thought of purging everything unnecessary – none of it which is valuable – is quite appealing to me. We’ll obviously keep the sentimental things, but most everything else can go. For instance, this desk at which I’m currently sitting…why keep it?

Second, I always thought Rob would handle all the maintenance of the RV. And by that I mean not only the vehicle-type of maintenance, but also all the RV systems -- hooking up when we arrive at a new location, handling gray water, black water, etc. But this book made me realize it is vitally important for me to know all these things too.

And third, we’re going to get our whole family passports before we go (our adult ones have expired and the kids have not yet needed them). Not only is a passport the best form of identification around, but it would certainly enable any impromptu visits to Canada when we’re near the border. (No driving the RV into Mexico, thank you very much. I’ve been to several cities and beaches in Mexico and love it, but the thought of driving our entire life (especially young children) over the border into a sometimes-lawless place that preys on tourists…well, we’re brave but not stupid!)

Northside RVs

Jill's Journal: A delayed anniversary babysitting gift from my sister and brother-in-law netted us a few glorious child-free hours on Friday afternoon to spend as we pleased. We turned it into a great fact-finding mission at Northside RVs in Lexington, which claims to be Kentucky’s largest RV dealer. The number one thing we learned? There’s so much to learn and so many options!

We’ve looked at literally hundreds of blueprints online and in catalogues, but it was so incredibly helpful to actually see some in person. The manager of the place seemed to be a straight-shooter, always a welcome thing in a salesman, and spent nearly two hours with us. He took us into about 10 different models, a nice mix of motorhomes and fifth wheels, so we could really get a feel for our different options. We have so much to think about.

At dinner afterward, Rob put it eloquently and perfectly: “A motorhome is the sexy option, but a fifth wheel is the smart option.” And that’s what we’re thinking. As much as we’d love a Class A motorhome with the accompanying bells and whistles, we can get the same square footage in a fifth wheel for a fraction of the price. And these next two years on the road aren’t about living in luxury and comfort. They’re about enjoying life with just the basics and being comfortable enough. A fifth wheel fits the bill just fine (and a fancy fifth wheel gives us a bill of about one-third the price tag of a basic motorhome!).

Back to the Drawing Board

Jill's Journal: After researching what seems to be hundreds of floor plans to find the one that would fit our needs best, Rob thought he’d found our future RV. Until tonight. We want to pull a trailer behind the RV to carry our minivan, but we just learned the model we had our eye on doesn’t have the towing capacity we need. So, it’s back to the drawing board.

Rob had another thought as well. Perhaps a travel trailer might also suit us well. It still gives us 40 feet of living space and the spare vehicle we need, as we’d have to tow it with a truck. That truck could then be unhitched and the trailer left in a park…that way Rob could still work uninterrupted while I’m off exploring with the girls. There’s just no way around it – we need some kind of vehicle and some living space. So maybe this is an option. We shall see.

We really believe we’d prefer a conventional RV instead of a travel trailer, but the latter is far more economical and may be the smarter way to go. Again, we shall see.

We’re also constantly on the lookout for great ideas to help us through that year or two and we found one recently! Space Bags, the kind where you suck the air out of the storage bag with a vacuum. We bought some a week or so ago to see how they might work and it appears they’ll suit our purposes quite nicely. We’re planning to live in quite the minimalistic manner, but with three little kids and two adults, we’re going to need at least a few pieces of clothing! Our big concern is winter clothes vs. summer clothes. We plan to follow the seasons for the majority of the time, but how nice will it be to be able shrink our jackets and blankets when we’re in a hot climate?